Definitions

A very talented photographer that I follow recently tweeted, “When I don’t understand someone, I am careful to file them in the ‘to-be-discovered’ section instead of the trash bin.” He really got me to thinking about how if we aren’t careful about really getting to know a person without an agenda, we might miss something of value.


I try to never define people or things. I don’t always succeed, but I try. For instance, you could look at this and see a box of Kleenex. You’ve now defined it as a box of Kleenex and have made it much more difficult to see any other potential in it. If you don’t define it like that from the first moment you see it, you could have a box of Kleenex, or a room decoration, or a paperweight, or a projectile weapon, or a toy for a bored child, or a distraction for the cat, or “x”, or “y”, or “z.” Do you see where I’m going with this?

Once we put a label on somebody we make it so much more difficult on ourselves to see the potential that lies within them. We make it difficult for them, too, if they believe the label we give them. If I were to say that Joey is “just an average C student with little initiative or drive to better himself,” I have just defined him in a way that means I don’t have to help him grow. After all, in my definition, he is the problem, not me. I have also given Joey a reason to never try harder than he is trying right now. However, if I decide to not place any judgment or definition on Joey when I meet him, the world is his oyster and I can encourage him to achieve his dreams. By virtue of doing this, I’ve also helped Joey to not put any restrictive label on himself that will keep him from discovering his full potential. Now Joey can be just a C-student or he can be a compassionate child that helps others, or he can be a great helper in the classroom, or he can be a wonderful friend that everybody likes, or he can be a trouble maker, or he can be a genius that is bored so he doesn’t do his work which is why he gets Cs. See the difference that not pigeon-holing somebody can make?

Similarly, if I define myself by my perceived problems or by my occupation or by my family or by anything other than “child of God” I am doing myself a disservice. I am denying myself the ability to discover the God-given potential within when I place those restrictions on what I believe I am capable of achieving, being, or doing.

We have to learn that just because we may see something or someone in a certain way today, that is not all they are capable of being, doing, or becoming. There is so much potential in everything and every person that we encounter – from the person in the mirror, to the person in the check-out line, to the guy who cut you off on the freeway, to the prisoner, to the child that you tuck into bed each night. Remember to help each person reach their potential by not putting restrictive definitions on them so that you can be allowed to discover what and who they truly are.